Tony Day - Songs For Squirmy Children

Songs For Squirmy Children:

All songs by Tony Day and Todd Elsliger

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TOYS

How many toys are ever enough, I don’t even play with half this stuff

Don’t you try to throw anything away, I’ll want it back the very next day

Teddy bear teddy bear where are you,? Are you hanging out with the robot crew

Down by the castle with the rubber snake, or under the bed with the roller blades

Whatever the occasion, use your imagination

There is a toy that’s perfect for every situation

Got enough cars to fill a parking lot. Got enough trucks to build a lot of stuff

I’ve been laying tracks for my diesel train. Up in the sky it's a fighter plane

Lego on the floor in between your toes, puzzle on the table where it shouldn’t go

Hungry Hungry Hippo that I never play, and I like to keep it all on display

Whatever the occasion, use your imagination

There is a toy that’s perfect for every situation

I’m out of batteries, 9 volts of ecstasy I

Lost the adapter for the drone I begged Santa to bring me

How many toys are ever enough, I don’t even play with half this stuff

That won’t even stop me from wanting more, is there any way that you could buy the store?

Teddy bear teddy bear one and two, three, four, and five look a lot like you

I’m losing track of all your names. Haven’t even tried half these games

Whatever the occasion, use you imagination

There is a toy that’s perfect for every situation

FISHY

Look at me, I’m like a fish

I kick my feet like a motorboat

I wave my hands and then I float

In the sea, or at the pool

I jump right in like a baby seal

I splash around like it’s no big deal

‘cause I’m a great big fishy with a swishy tail

a great big fishy with a swishy tail oh yeah

I’m a great big fishy with a swishy tail

Look out below, I’m on the slide

Coming down faster than a great big wave

Going underwater then up again

I hold my breath, and close my eyes

Then I jump up like the dolphins do

I bet I can swim faster than you

‘cause I’m a great big fishy with a swishy tail

a great big fishy with a swishy tail oh yeah

I’m a great big fishy with a swishy tail

Look at me, I’m like a fish

I can take a bath with the best of them

Bubbles in my hair and on my chin

Until I’m clean, and soaking wet

Wrap me in the biggest towel you can find

I can’t live on land, for too much time

‘cause I’m a great big fishy with a swishy tail

a great big fishy with a swishy tail oh yeah

I’m a great big fishy with a swishy tail

123 MY ABCs

123 my ABCs, won’t you teach these things to me

Dance around and sing along, then turn it all into a song

Do Re Mi, what do you see, will you play the notes for me

Up and down the scales we go, now we’re ready for the show

1 2 3 my A B Cs. 1 2 3 my A B Cs

123 and 456, turn around and pick up sticks

Move your body to the beat, clap your hands and stomp your feet

Do Re Mi and Do Si Do, spin your partner to and fro

Spell my name and I’ll spell yours, letters spill out on the floor

Do Re Mi is french you know, on y danse tout en rond

Comme ci comme ca et je m’appelle, I’m learning fast as you can tell

1 plus 3 and minus 2, all that’s left is me and you

and you have so much more to show, about the things I wanna know

1 2 3 my A B Cs. 1 2 3 my A B Cs

THE COLD

I’m not afraid of the cold,

that only happens when you get old.

Bury me up to my armpits in

snow, and I’ll just wiggle on out

I’m not afraid of the cold

I’m not afraid of the wind,

I’ll build a fort that we can hide In.

The harder it blows the deeper we’ll dig,

t’ill we find Eskimos

I’m not afraid of the wind

I’m not afraid of the winter ‘cause that’s what I wear my mittens for

You zip up my one-piece snowsuit and I stay all cozy and warm

I’m not afraid of the ice,

I might have fallen down once or Twice

Skating around under Christmas lights,

and I’m just as fast as you

I’m not afraid of the ice

I’m not afraid of the winter ‘cause that’s what I wear my mittens for

You zip up my one-piece snowsuit and I stay all cozy and warm

I’m not afraid of the cold,

that only happens when you get old

I’m not afraid of the wind,

I’ll build a fort that we can hide in

I DON’T SPEAK DOG

You wag your tail, that means you’re happy

You lick my face, that’s how you kiss me

You dig a hole, that means you’re restless

And when you sit by the door with those puppy eyes

You’re telling me it’s time to take you outside

I don’t speak dog but I know what you’re saying

BARK BARK give me a bone

When you purr, then I should pet you

When you run, I always chase you

You let me know, when I should feed you

By scratching up the chair that I’m sitting on

You land on 4 paws no matter where you jump

I don’t speak cat but I know what you’re saying

MEOW MEOW leave me alone

Stoop and scoop, pick up the poop

Change that kitty litter, before it smells bad

Vacuum the hair, it gets everywhere

That’s how you treat a best friend

You sing a song, so you’re a budgie

You squeak and chirp, so you’re a gerbil

You’re always quiet, so you’re a lizard

One more creature and we’ll have a zoo

I wish I could talk to every one of you

I don’t speak budgie but I know what you’re saying

TWEET TWEET put food in my bowl

MEOW MEOW leave me alone

I don’t speak dog but I know what you’re saying

I WANNA BE A PIRATE

When I was a polliwog swimming in the pond

All my friends knew what they want to be when they grew up

And though I think a fireman’s a good and noble cause

Its not for me I want to be something against the law

Hey Ho Hey and a sippy cup of gin, I want to be a pirate so where do I begin?

I have a shirt with ruffles and a tattoo of my mom

But the thing that sold me most I heard they do whatever they want

My best friend is a princess and my brother is a vet

A kid across the street wears a crown upon his head

This neighborhood is full of superheroes wearing capes

I’m not the type, I’m like the evil genius who escapes

Hey Ho Hey and a sippy cup of gin, I want to be a pirate so where do I begin?

I’m growing in a black beard even though it simply won’t

But the thing that sold me most I heard they do whatever they want

Cowboys are annoying and unicorns aren’t real

I used to want to be an astronaut but here’s the deal

A PhD in physics isn’t written in my cards

I’d rather hunt for treasure with a shovel in the yard

Hey Ho Hey and a sippy cup of gin, I want to be a pirate so where do I begin?

I never brush my teeth at night, at least the ones I’ve got

But the thing that sold me most I heard they do whatever they want

I travel in a minivan and rule the seven seas

I wear a patch upon my eye, tucked into my sleeve is

A hook that that my dad fashioned from some tin foil on a stick

And now he counts the days until I grow out of it

Hey Ho Hey and a sippy cup of gin, I want to be a pirate so where do I begin?

My parrot is a teddy bear, my wooden leg is strong

But the thing that sold me is I heard they do whatever they want

Hey Ho Hey and a sippy cup of juice, lock up all your children a pirate’s on the loose

My enemies are terrified, when they hear my song

But the thing that sold me most I heard they do whatever they want

PLAY THAT SONG AGAIN

Dancing in circles, ‘till I’m dizzy falling down

Swing both my arms, till my big feet leave the ground

And when it’s all over, and the music fades away

You’ll hear me say, play that song again

Play that song again

I know the words, and I love to sing the tune

The rhythm is steady, and it bounces ‘round the room

And when it’s all over, and the music fades away

You’ll hear me say, play that song again

Play that song again

I like when it’s quiet, and I love when it gets loud

It’s even more fun when, we can all dance in a crowd

And when it’s all over, and the music fades away

You’ll hear me say, day after day,

Won’t you please play

that song again

REAL FOOD

Chocolate milk and cookies, Ice cream on a cone

Give me figgy pudding, feed me something sweet

Golden chicken nuggets, crispy bag of chips

Cheesy powder fingers, feed me something salty

You gave it to me once, and that’s on you

Now I’ll never go back to eating real food

Take me to McDonalds, or a Pizza Hut

Cover me in french fries, let the ketchup flow

Cereal for breakfast, cereal for lunch

Cereal for dinner, cereal for bedtime

You gave it to me once, and that’s on you

Now I’ll never go back to eating real food

Sorry for the mess, but I always seem to get some on me

It isn’t often best, but always tastes good

I don’t remember salad, can’t remember fish

Won’t be eating veggies ‘cause they’re never on my dish

Since you tried the first time, and I made a fuss

Now I’m eating noodles with butter as the sauce

You gave it to me once, and that’s on you

Now I’ll never go back to eating real food

THE PARK

Take me to, the park today, I want to play in the grass

The sun is out, the trees are tall, the sidewalk leads to the path

When we spend time together, it make me feel so good

I can’t wait ‘till we get there, the park in our neighborhood

Ba ba baaa..

I can climb, and I can swing. I can dig in the sand

I say hello to other kids, and try to make a new friend

When we spend time together, it make me feel so good

I can’t wait ‘till we get there, the park in our neighborhood

Take me to, the park today, and push me down the biggest slide

Spin me round the carousel, and catch me on the other side

When we spend time together, it make me feel so good

I can’t wait ‘till we get there, the park in our neighborhood

SLEEPY

I swam like a fish in the pool all morning

‘till you packed me up on our way to the grocery store

We have a deal, I get to pick my cereal

Then I promise not to bother you no more I’m Sleepy

I blame this warm car, and this comfy seat you have me strapped into I’m Sleepy

If we don’t stop for food, I can’t guarantee there won’t be a meltdown soon

The mid day sun is shining in the sky

We pull into McDonald’s for another happy meal

If they’re out of the toy I need for my collection

Someone’s gonna get a piece of my mind I’m Sleepy

I blame this warm car, and this comfy seat you have me strapped into I’m Sleepy

If you don’t play a song I like, I can’t guarantee there won’t be a meltdown soon

A cool breeze from the open window, a motorcycle races by

A fluffy dog on the sidewalk, that might have caught my eye

A cartoon on an iPad

Cheerios straight from the box

I picked a fight with the sandman and I think I might have lost

We pull into the driveway, while the sun is setting

But I don’t remember how, I got my PJs on

Someone must have carried me, up the stairs to bed

And I’m not ashamed to say, this wasn’t the first time I’m Sleepy

I blame this warm car, and this comfy seat you have me strapped into I’m Sleepy

But I don’t want to close my eyes, in case I miss something good